Trend Fails

Trend /  verb    :   “To emerge as a popular trend; be currently popular”

A trend, according to Webster’s dictionary, requires that a thing or idea takes on momentum in such a way that it catches on, gains speed, and catches the eye of the majority of the populace for at least a moment.

Examples of successful trends include using underarm deodorant, driving cars instead of horses, and central heating and air. These were all not only popular, but they caught on in a way that didn’t make you point and laugh.

It’s far less often we get to hear about those other ideas that, how can we put this- fell face first into a complete flop of a failure. Today it’s time to unearth some of these notions, in a segment I like to call “Trend Fails.”

#1: iPad-tucked-in-pants-guy


Pockets may get bigger. Tablets may get smaller. But I’m pretty sure, stowing your iPad “where the good Lord split ya” will not be catching on any time in the near future. File this one under “man, that’s just not sanitary.”

#2: The Boat-Car

I have to admit, when I first saw one of these in a Bond film as a kid, I thought they were the coolest thing ever. Who am I kidding, a boat car would be the coolest thing ever. This should not be on the list. This trend would be an epic win.

#3: Microsoft Clippy

“It looks like you’re trying to do something semi-productive in Windows. Would you like me to pop-up and interrupt with some possible solutions?” This Gates-created trend never took off, but I firmly believe it was reincarnated as what we now know as “autocorrect.”

#4: Smell-O-Vision

This actually happened. Back in 1960, the suave guys in the above photo invented a machine that spewed out odors to correspond with different scenes in a movie. This retired stink-producing product is another one that was reincarnated, in this life known as “The Twilight Series.”

What do you think? Wish any of these would come back around in the trend-o-sphere? Any failed trends that I’ve missed?

  • http://deuceology.wordpress.com Larry Carter

    I’m hoping for an Odor App, so I can get a whiff of the folks I’m reading.

    • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

      I’m pretty sure you’d have about a 90% dissappointment factor, but hey, you never know what trends will take hold. I say go for it…

      • http://www.ramblingbarba.com Ken Hagerman

        Larry thinking: I never knew the Barba smelled so much like Queso fundido and bug spray. ;-)>

  • http://dancarman.blogspot.com/ Daniel Carman

    What about the “trend” where some folks type pithy observations and other bon mots on a semi-regular basis into an electronic box that somehow then transmits their words to the entire world? Nah, that is just too fantastic to believe. Plus, it would never catch on.

    • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

      You’re right, this sounds a bit too ridiculous, Dan…  ;)

      PS- “Bon mots” officially added to my vocabulary.

  • austingilly

    I love trying to start trends! Some that weren’t so successful were wearing my pants and shorts inside out and saying “that’s nectar” (even though the guy from New Girl said it). I’m gonna put everything in my belt now, its like a Bat Belt.

    • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

      Nice one, Shmidt- I mean, Austin!
      I think your belt idea will work. If it works for a superhero, I say do it.

  • Ricky Anderson

    I’m a little embarrassed that I know someone who does item #1 and I’d totally buy items #2 and #4.

    BUT ITEM #3 TOTALLY PISSED ME OFF.

    • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

      Clippy was a jerk, let’s just call it out. I do not miss him.

      And, really? The iPad thing? I thought it was just an urban legend and am having a hard time believing people actually do that.

      • Ricky Anderson

        My father-in-law walks with two canes and cannot carry his iPad, so he sticks it in his waistband.

        I would rather velcro it to my head than stick it in my drawers, but that’s just me.

        • http://undistractedchristian.com/ Tyler Hess

          how about a fanny pack? the iFanny

          • Phil

            This reminds me of a trend that I’m glad is for the most part long gone. I had one of those god awful fanny packs, and I hope they never return

          • http://www.ramblingbarba.com Ken Hagerman

            Sadly the fanny pack is all the rage down here in South America. I can walk out of my house 1 block and have a selection of fanny packs. IF I WANTED ONE…

          • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

            You know you want one, Ken :)

          • Ricky Anderson

            He would require a rather…large fanny pack.

          • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

            My wife and I went on a hunt one time to find her a fanny pack. It concerns me that this is desirable for her, but I think she’s just trying to re-start the trend…

        • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

          I like the head-velcro idea, Ricky. Let’s get that trending…

  • http://www.lifeofasteward.com Loren Pinilis

    Oh man, that clip thing used to get on my nerves so bad. Who actually thought that would be a good idea?

    And why would that guy store his iPad there when he’s got both hands free just walking around? I think I might just try that with my grocery bags next time I’m at the store. Maybe they’re on to something?

    • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

      Love it, Loren. We all should start storing things in our britches and see if it starts trending.

  • http://undistractedchristian.com/ Tyler Hess

    the best use of “smellovision” is Soaring Over California at Disneyland’s California Adventure in Anaheim…it’s awesome…you probably don’t know what i’m talking about…youtube it or something

    • Phil

      I can give an amen

    • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

      You’re right- no idea what that was until I looked it up… and I am impressed! Smell-o-vision lives!! 

  • Richgrasso81

    Mismatched converse! Bring the 80s back!!

    • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

      See, that’s kind of a cool trend, Rich :) 
      I could totally see you pulling that off! You need to go for it.

  • Phil

    I’m trying to come up with a witty trend, but I cannot. But I really enjoyed your list. I’d buy a boat car

    • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

      Boat-car all the way! Why are those not being mass-produced around the world?!

  • http://www.ramblingbarba.com Ken Hagerman

    As for number 1, please tell me the camera is OFF. 

    Number 2: One of these cars sat on a used car lot in my town in upstate SC for almost a year, too high. 

    Number 4: If this were still around could you imagine the apocalyptic ramifications of Fear Factor. Rivers of puke over run major cities…

    • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

      1- HA! I sure hope he’s not sending out a life video stream…
      2- And I would posit that the ability to drive in amphibious fashion would truly be priceless…
      4- :) That would be nasty. I personally thought of Dumb And Dumber. Funny, but would not want to smell it.

  • http://randomlychad.com Chad Jones

    Being in tech, I’m surprised I’ve not seen #1.

    #2 I’ve seen–I have kids–but let’s not talk about that. ;-)

    Clippy is the devil!

    Who needs Smell-O-Vision when they’ve got kids?

    • http://thebeardedidealist.com/ Stephen Haggerty

      Wait- what does having kids have to do with boat-cars? I get #4- kids are just plain smelly, but I’m not sure I see how they tie into amphibious vehicles…

  • http://twitter.com/realpats0 pats0

    How about that crazy trend where-in every frat-boy called one another “bro”…what? That’s still happening? Crap!

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